《像小鹿》(As The Deer)

認識《As The Deer》這首歌,已是二十多年前的事,它曾令我流過不少感動之淚。

也唱過幾個不同的中譯版本。

幾年前,為這首歌的一個合唱譜做過一個粵譯,但當中只有第一節的歌詞,也沒有正式發表過。

大半年前,動工重新做一個有齊三節的粵譯,但寫來寫去也不太滿意,便擱下了。

因著將要在團契領短崇,本來預備了楊以澤弟兄的版本,才醒覺自己有一個久違了的半製成品,於是帶著新靈感和近月的一些譯詞經驗,兼參考了楊弟兄的版本後,寫成了以下這個版本。

《像小鹿》

Written by Martin J. Nystrom
粵譯:海牛

參:http://youtu.be/bQiP524knbM

像小鹿渴慕純淨溪水
我靈緊跟主腳跟
我多麼渴望朝拜恩主
心裡渴想只有祢
As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee
(副歌)

副歌:祢方可賜力量保障
   呈身心遵主旨意至上
   我多麼渴望朝拜恩主
   心裡渴想只有祢
   You alone are my strength, my shield
   To You alone may my spirit yield
   You alone are my heart’s desire
   And I long to worship Thee

是我友伴祢是我兄長
縱然身居天國君
我心中對祢無限愛慕
超過眾事物人情
You’re my friend and You are my brother
Even though You are a King
I love You more than any other
So much more than anything
(副歌)

獨有祢可使我真飽足
榮華珍寶皆看輕
獨有祢可給予我快樂
主乃我真真至愛
I want You more than gold or silver,
Only You can satisfy
You alone are the real joygiver
And the apple of my eye.
(副歌)

《恩主聖臉,天使常可得親見》(His Countenance Angels Can Often Behold 祂的臉面祂的天使)

倪柝聲這名字在中國近代基督教史上很具爭議性,在此不論。

然而,《祂的臉面祂的天使》或《祂的臉面,祂的天使常看見》這首倪柝聲先生的詞作卻令海牛深受感動,當中所表達那為主受苦的心志,是我們這些生活在信仰相對自由的環境之現代信徒所欠缺的;其英文歌詞,同樣動人,至於由誰撰寫,我卻不得而知。

在網上找到一篇這首詩歌的簡介:http://www.churchinmarlboro.org/hymns/hymmary373.htm

做這個粵譯,要兼顧中英兩詞的原意,所花的時間頗長,來來回回也修改了數十次……

《恩主聖臉,天使常可得親見》

中詞:倪柝聲 Watchman Nee
Music by William James Kirkpatrick
粵譯:海牛

參:https://www.hymnal.net/en/hymn/ch/303
  https://www.hymnal.net/en/hymn/h/1137

恩主聖臉 天使常可得親見
祂恩愛 卻未可分沾
祂的愛深廣 聖徒銘記在心
不過于今不見聖容
過不久眾聖徒便親睹主臉
得享受主榮光顯現
然馬利亞有幸看到主哭泣
得撫摸祂心中痛處
得撫摸主心裡疼痛
His countenance angels can often behold,
But ne’er taste His love in His grace;
His saints, though they know of His pure, boundless love,
Have never yet once seen His face.
His saints will before long His visage behold,
E’en in His bright glory will share;
But Mary, beholding His tears as He wept,
Could touch His heart’s agony there.
Could touch His heart’s agony there.

恩主真面貌 我們即將相見
今昔也未有此體驗
祂今於我心碎處撫摸治傷
他朝這觸感卻難嘗
那天嘴巴雖頌獻不息歌讚
可已沒再勤懇泣禱
難再得到穿越痛楚的安撫
不見苦境所生信靠
不見苦困所教虔信
We’ll soon see the Lord, as He is, face to face,
We’ll know Him as never before;
But that touch today, healing our broken heart,
In that day will be felt no more.
That day, though our lips offer unceasing praise,
No tears, then, nor prayers fervent burn;
Nor is there the comfort received through much pain,
Nor trust gained through trials to learn,
Nor trust gained through trials to learn.

他朝縱有光輝無比的冠冕
可苦架路亦已行完
主因我受難 苦裡甘美契通
只可今天跟祂共嘗
進安息 我眾自此再沒愁煩
可也沒有時機分擔
與恩主經試煉 替祂遭艱苦
因祂拋開今生暢快
因祂拋棄今世樂暢
Exceeding in glory, that day we’ll be crowned,
Yet there’ll be no cross to obey;
The sweet fellowship of His suff’rings for us
We only can share in today.
Once we’ve that rest entered, no weariness then,
Nor chance will remain to partake
The trials nor the hardships, nor happiness lost,
Nor suffering borne for His sake,
Nor suffering borne for His sake.

噢 跟主共患難時機不多了
跟祂甘受慢侮嘲笑
得祂與共艱苦 蒙福這日子
將於不久一去不回
飽經孤單 鄙視 誤解的悲痛
將再莫見如煙失蹤
這跟主甘美合~一的祝福
主啊 於我珍惜寶貴
主啊 於我珍貴至寶
Oh, chances to suffer for Him are so few,
His shame and derision to bear;
Such blest opportunities soon pass away,
That He in our troubles may share.
All loneliness, misunderstandings and scorn
Despisings and sorrows will flee;
I treasure these blessings, for through them, O Lord,
I enter sweet oneness with Thee,
I enter sweet oneness with Thee.

恩主聖臉 但願能早早得見
跟主見面 樂不可支
今生試煉卻未求給我倖免
因這光陰珍貴亦甜
憐我 憫我 以大愛將我充滿
使我盡獻為主過活
免得我今生切盼他朝天福
他朝追悔卻已錯過
他朝追悔只有恨錯
I long to behold, Lord, Thy countenance soon,
What rapture with Thee, Lord, to meet.
But neither seek I all these trials to avoid;
Such times, Lord, are too rare and sweet.
Have mercy on me, fill me with Thy great love,
For Thee, Lord, to live at all cost;
Lest Thy servant, hoping for that blessed day,
That day, regret chances were lost,
That day, regret chances were lost.

《來看哪,父神賜我眾的愛》(Behold What Manner of Love)

《Behold What Manner of Love》是一首洗腦級的短詩,歌詞取材自約翰壹書3:1,可以不斷的重唱、輪唱,三十多年來,在坊間卻似乎還未見有一個粵譯版本,海牛一直也有把它翻譯的念頭,卻苦無靈感,今午又在hymnal.net遇見它,花了個多小時,就做了這個:

《來看哪,父神賜我眾的愛》

Written by Patricia Van Tine
粵譯:海牛

參:https://www.hymnal.net/en/hymn/ns/323

來看哪 父~神賜我眾的愛多深又多長
來看哪 父~神賜我眾的愛多高多廣闊
我竟跟你得稱上帝(或上主)親兒
我竟跟你得稱祂子女
Behold what manner of love
 The Father has given unto us,
Behold what manner of love
 The Father has given unto us,
That we should be called the sons of God,
That we should be called the sons of God.

《恩主使我能活像光》(God Make My Life a Little Light 生命如光歌)

《生命如光歌》是另一首我輩由兒時至今常唱的詩歌,歌詞很易背誦,但其不協粵音之程度也確是一絕,一直也有把它重譯的念頭,卻發覺頗難做得好,恰巧這兩個星期公理堂的JoyfulKids就是唱著這個,於是重燃決心,花了數天,做了這個,雖不算太完美,也算是合格吧?!其中最難做的是每節的首句,尤其是第四、五兩節,而第五節整節也花了我數天時間來苦苦思考怎譯才能把原文的意思表達得好,最後仍是離不開劉廷芳、楊蔭瀏合譯的藍本。

《恩主使我能活像光》

Words by Ma­til­da Barbara Betham-Ed­wards
Music “NOX PRAECESSIT” by Jean Baptiste Calkin
粵譯:海牛

參:http://cyberhymnal.org/mid/n/o/x/nox_praecessit.mid

恩主使我能活像光
照明在此世上
如星火舌點燃耀眼
無論哪一方往
God make my life a little light
Within the world to glow;
A little flame that burneth bright,
Wherever I may go.

恩主使我能活像花
為鄰舍添笑臉
園圃雖似簡樸狹小
無礙我花開遍
God make my life a little flower
That giveth joy to all,
Content to bloom in native bower,
Although the place be small.

恩主使我能活像歌
紓愁悶解憂傷
詞曲鼓舞助人壯膽
還讓唱者歡暢
God make my life a little song
That comforteth the sad
That helpeth others to be strong,
And makes the singer glad.

恩主使我活像杖杆
讓疲弱可靠傍
求傾出我健強力氣
勤侍友親近鄰
God make my life a little staff
Whereon the weak may rest,
That so what health and strength I have
May serve my neighbors best.

恩主使我活似聖詩
柔和頌恩的詩
長青不朽忠信的詩
常頌主工妙奇
God make my life a little hymn
Of tenderness and praise,
Of faith, that never waxeth dim,
In all His wondrous ways.

《馬利亞,妳可知?》(Mary, Did You Know?)

《Mary, Did You Know?》是一首我每聽也動容的歌,在CantonHymn維基平台,已載有甄燕鳴老師的大作《其實妳可知?》,兼已製作了MV,上載於YouTube。可是,我仍是很想做一個海牛的版本。本想在剛過去的聖誕前完成,奈何那時沒太多靈感,寫不出什麼來。又本來像甄氏以「其實妳可知」來譯首句,是自然不過的事,但為免拾人牙慧,我嘗試改用反問句來譯,意思也差不遠吧?!另外,我始終很想將馬利亞的名字譯進詞中,想破了頭皮,最終決定就算有些許不協音(馬利亞是洋名,些許不協音,也就許我吧!),也要填在現在的位置。而為此,我大膽地把每段第三組句子,跟第四組對調,那是改動了歌曲的高潮位,雖有不足,但我仍竭力保留著原文的意思。

由於此曲的旋律版本眾多,我決定選了這個我個人最喜愛的版本來配詞。

《馬利亞,妳可知?》

Words by Mark Lowry
Music by Buddy Greene
粵譯:海牛

參:http://youtu.be/C1DZA_TdBBI

難道妳不知 懷中的小寶
有日獨履海強渡
難道妳不知 懷中的小寶
是人類萬代救贖
問可知 妳新生寶貝
來為救妳得生
噢~ 馬利亞 妳可知
妳一生因他更新
Mary, did you know that your Baby Boy
would one day walk on water?
Mary, did you know that your Baby Boy
would save our sons and daughters?
Did you know that your Baby Boy
has come to make you new?
This Child that you delivered
will soon deliver you.

難道妳不知 懷中的小寶
會令瞎眼睹真光
豈不知道麼 懷中的小寶
會平定惡風駭浪
問可知 每親這寶貝
實在吻至高主
噢~ 馬利亞 妳可知
他足跡已踏諸天
Mary, did you know that your Baby Boy
will give sight to a blind man?
Mary, did you know that your Baby Boy
will calm the storm with His hand?
Did you know that your Baby Boy
has walked where angels trod?
When you kissed your little Baby
you kissed the face of God?

[Oh Mary‭, ‬did you know‭?]

瞎子看到 失聰聽到
逝者復活離墓
跛足奔走 啞巴開口
頌聖羔歌不休
The blind will see. The deaf will hear.
The dead will live again.
The lame will leap.The dumb will speak
The praises of The Lamb.

難道妳不知 懷中的小寶
乃造化眾生主宰
豈不知道麼 懷中的小寶
要成萬國的君主
問可知 臂彎中寶貝
是自有永活神
噢~ 豈知他也同是
完美贖罪牲
Mary, did you know that your Baby Boy
is Lord of all creation?
Mary, did you know that your Baby Boy
would one day rule the nations?
Did you know that your Baby Boy
is heaven’s perfect Lamb?
The sleeping Child you’re holding
is the Great, I Am.

《主!我將心獻給祢》(Lord, I give my heart to You, Surrender myself unto Thee)

在hymnal.net遇見這首詩歌,作者不詳,寫的是對上主愛慕之情,又因當中引用了新郎新婦的比喻,愚見以為也適用於婚禮時詠唱,花了數天,做了個粵譯,送給主內將要結合的新人們。

《主!我將心獻給祢》

Words and Music by unknown
粵譯:海牛

參:https://www.hymnal.net/en/hymn/ns/492

主!我將心獻給~你
降服一生交在你手~~~
自心底傾出深深的愛
呈奉我君主我夫婿
Lord, I give my heart to You,
Surrender myself unto Thee;
Love pours from the depths of my being;
My King, my Husband, my Lord.

  你溫婉低語 你關心愛護
  催使我跟你靠近
  哪可以取替 你超級美麗
  我甘心給主愛鎖緊
  Your soft voice, Your lovingkindness
  Draws me closer to You.
  Your love constrains me; caught in Your beauty.
  Lord, there’s none more worthy than You.

現在新郎娶他新婦
連合於一起永不分~~~
就像恩主伴我永共行
照樣我願相伴於你
Together, one united,
The Bridegroom and His bride;
Lord, I want to be Your companion
The way that You’ve become mine.

《齊來讚美主聖名》(We Praise Your Name)

這是另一首三數年前粵譯的合唱詩,也是同一原因,未有發表;有幾處當年做得未夠好的,現在都微調了。

《齊來讚美主聖名》

Words and Music by Ruth Elaine Schram – Lorenz Corporation
粵詞:海牛

參:http://www.jwpepper.com/sheet-music/media-player.jsp?&type=audio&productID=10058510

[] = 和聲部

 齊來 讚美 我主~救恩
[unison]
 現在 及永遠 也不~變更
[unison]
 藉歡欣歌聲宣講基督國度光輝
[unison]
 齊來 讚美 高舉 救主~聖名
[unison]

*齊來  讚美 我主~救恩
[  高歌  歡欣   向主名頌讚]
 現在 及永遠 也不~變更
[  恩主  永遠   信實從沒變]
 藉歡欣歌聲宣講基督國度光輝
[     傳說祢國尊貴光輝]
 齊來 讚美 高舉 救主~聖名
[一起 讚美 高舉 主耶~~穌]

 縱眾山嶺一朝塌下
[unison]
 傾覆於翻滾~海心
[unison]
 祢作堅障並力保
[祢作堅固的保障]
 深知祢永看守
[深知主必看守]
 心中不擔憂
[心中不掛憂]

repeat *

 高歌 歡欣 向主名頌讚
[unison]
 恩主 永遠 信實從沒變
[unison]
 傳說祢國尊貴光輝
[宣講基督國度光輝]
 齊來 讚美 高舉 救主~聖名
[一起 讚美 高舉 主耶~~穌]

repeat *

 讚美 高舉 救主~聖名
[讚美 高舉 主耶~~穌]
 讚美 高舉 救主~聖名
[unison]
 讚祢名
[頌耶穌]

Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name,
ever and ever and ever the same.
Your majesty and glory we will gladly proclaim!
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.

*Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name,
[Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name,]
ever and ever and ever the same.
[Jesus, Jesus, forever the same.]
Your majesty and glory we will gladly proclaim!
[Your glory we will gladly proclaim!]
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.
[Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.]

Though the mountains crumble apart,
tumble to the heart of the sea,
You will be our strength and shield!
You will never leave us,
never forsake us!

repeat *

Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.
Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.
Jesus, Jesus, forever the same.
Your glory we will gladly proclaim!
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.

repeat *

Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name.
Jesus, Jesus, we praise Your Name,
praise Your Name.

《神的創造》(God’s Creation)

這是三數年前做的一首合唱詩粵譯,因當年的一些計劃,一直沒有發表過,現在貼出來,做個記錄。這些年來,只覺自己對翻譯以創造為題材的詩歌比較得心應手,也做得比較多,這首也是我做粵譯以來最滿意的作品之一。

《神的創造》

Words and Music by Anna Laura Page & Jean Anne Shafferman
  – Alfred Music Publishing
粵譯:海牛

參:http://www.jwpepper.com/sheet-music/media-player.jsp?&type=audio&productID=10010906

很久遠以先 漆黑遍地蔽天 教萬有主發悶
祂張眼四方 嘴巴有話要講 主創造正式開展
天鋪日月星 管晚上白晝 飛鳥唱歌和鳴動聽
滿海是大魚 花襯綠樹蔭 皆主創奇妙工
來歡唱 神開創 這新天地之喜
看一切 神所創 多麼好 多麼美
來歡唱 神開創 這新天地之喜
看一切 神所創 真太好 榮又美
Once upon a time the world was very dark;
  God felt very lonely.
He looked all around, His face bent in a frown;
  and then He started making:
the sun and the moon, the stars in the sky,
  all of the birds that fly up high,
the fish in the sea, the flowers and trees
  are all a part of God’s
creation, creation; God made a great new world.
Creation, creation, and it was very good!
Creation, creation; God made a great new world.
Creation, creation, and it was very good!

經過第五天 生機似盡已展 卻未慰主厭悶
祂張眼四方 嘴巴有話再講 這創造要有加添
獅在怒吼(ROAR!) 鴨在笑(QUACK!) 家裡小狗常吠叫(WOOF!)
尊尚目的 配男女 照著神樣式
來歡唱 神開創 這新天地之喜
看一切 神所創 多麼好 多麼美
來歡唱 神開創 這新天地之喜
看一切 神所創 真太好 榮又美
原來係這麼美!
By day number five the world had come alive;
  still God felt so lonely.
He loked all around, His face bent in a frown,
  and then He started making:
Lions that roar!(ROAR!) Ducks that quack!(QUACK!)
  Dogs that bark behind your back!(WOOF!)
Woman and man! What a plan!
  All are parts of God’s
creation, creation; God made a great new world.
Creation, creation, and it was very good!
Creation, creation; God made a great new world.
Creation, creation, and it was very good,
and it was very good!

《詩篇二十三篇》(「小羊創作─我心屬於你」詩集)

翻譯國語詩歌往往比翻譯英文詩歌更難,海牛的同事菲臘擅長為它們重寫新的粵詞,產量倒不少,月前見他在臉書群組上貼出這首,我一時興起,便試著另做一個粵譯的版本。

《詩篇二十三篇》
曲、詞:王愷君、林婉容
粵譯:海牛

參:http://youtu.be/710eyuDF01w

上帝我得祢作牧者
已一點都不缺
領我安趟於青青的草場
停歇於溪水邊

令我心甦醒轉路向
導我奔走公義徑
就算經幽深死蔭絕谷
亦未怕遇害
全賴祢伴著我走

還在我大敵對面
擺祝捷的宴席
為我膏(動詞讀「告」)油提拔我
流澤滿溢我杯
定有恩福愛護
一世跟我伴
願我永住在祢聖殿裡邊
千百萬世(百千億世)

上帝─我的親愛牧者

《這天天使歌》(On This Day Angels Sing)

後天聖誕日崇拜中,禮頓道公理堂日堂詩班將連同 JoyfulKids 小朋友們獻唱 Greg Gilpin 編撰的 On This Day Angels Sing,歌詞由鄙人粵譯。在此預祝各位聖誕快樂!

《這天天使歌》

Words from Piae Cantiones
(Adapted by Greg Gilpin)
Music by Greg Gilpin
粵譯:海牛

參考:http://youtu.be/VnfFdH9-OTg

願這天這讚歌
遍地和小孩唱
賀聖嬰君王誕
降世為來救贖
愛及和平賜下
On this day earth shall ring
With the song children sing
To the child, tiny King,
Born on earth to save us,
Peace and love He gave us.

耀景星天際顯
引博士三賢至
跪我主小床邊
獻奉珍貴禮物
讚頌與敬拜祂
Wondrous star o’er His head,
Wise Men three to Him led.
Kneel they low by His bed,
lay their gifts before Him.
Praise Him and adore Him.

(Gloria in Excelsis Deo…)

在這天天使歌
遍地和歡然唱
賀聖嬰君王誕
降世為來救贖
賜下愛與平安
On this day angels sing.
With their songs earth shall ring
Sounds of joy to the King!
Born on earth to save us,
Peace and love He gave us

(Gloria in Excelsis Deo…)

在這天天使歌 
On this day angels sing.